I lust for sex with other men and want to suggest an open relationship to my husband | The Sun
DEAR DEIDRE: I’M so excited by the thought of what sex would be like with other guys that I’m going to suggest to my husband that we have an open relationship.
I’ve only ever slept with him and I am so desperate to put my fantasies into action, but I don’t want to wreck my marriage.
I’m 27 and my husband is 30. We got together when I was 17 and we married when I was 22.
People think I’m lucky to have settled down with my first love, and I am — except I feel like I’ve missed out on so many experiences.
I adore him and our sex is good and loving, but I wonder if it might be better with someone else?
And even if it’s not better, it will be different.
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My fantasies about other men started when a guy chatted me up in a cafe.
He was so good-looking and, even though I brushed him off, that night I found myself thinking about him while I pleasured myself.
The next time my husband and I had sex, I imagined he was the other guy and my orgasms were off the scale.
Since then, I’ve often found myself flirting with men. I don’t want to split up with my husband, so surely an open relationship would be the perfect answer?
It’s OK for him — he slept with a few girls before we met.
DEIDRE SAYS: Open relationships are not the magic formula that many are looking for.
In order for non-monogamy to work, you both need to be secure in your relationship, be excellent communicators and be able to completely trust each other.
All too often, readers contact me when similar arrangements go wrong – someone has felt undermined, jealous or, worse still, fallen for the third person.
If you are insistent you want to try an open relationship, make sure you discuss the arrangement carefully with your husband and agree the rules.
Would you be able to sleep with the same third person multiple times?
Would you want to know who the other person was?
Would you go on dates with the third person or would it be purely about sex?
It would be better for your marriage to reboot your sexual relationship with your husband instead.
My support pack, 50 Ways To Add Fun To Sex, should help.
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